How was your day?
Get it off your chest.
Funeral, mortuary, transfer, cemetery, crematorium, coronial and celebrant work, and death doulas. Put down what you're carrying before you go home.
Which best describes you?
This changes a few questions and which support lines come first. You can change it any time.
Everything you enter stays on this phone. Nothing is sent to your employer, your manager or anyone else. Unladen Vigil is a prototype. It is not a medical or emergency service and is not connected to any funeral provider, coroner, employer or government agency. · Give feedback
Take a moment.
Step outside or into a quiet room if you can. Tell your manager or a colleague you need a few minutes. That's allowed.
Breathe with this
What you might be feeling
- Shaky, sick, or a racing heart
- Numb, or oddly calm
- Tearful, angry, or both
- Going over what you could have done differently
These are normal reactions. They usually settle over hours or days.
If what you saw won't leave you
Strong images, smells or sounds can come back for hours or days after a hard case. That's a normal reaction, not a sign you're not cut out for this. Talk to someone you trust today. If it's still strong after a couple of weeks, see your GP or EAP.
Ground yourself
Look around. Name them, out loud or in your head.
Call someone now
Add your manager, EAP or a colleague who gets it in so they're here when you need them.
Not sure who to tell?
If you don't feel safe telling your manager, there are other people you can go to. Or write down what happened, just for you, while it's fresh.
What helps after
Handover to yourself
A few minutes at the end of a day or call-out. Notice what you're carrying, then leave what you can at the door.
Please talk to someone now
You said you've had thoughts of harming yourself or not wanting to be here. Please call one of these now. If you're in immediate danger, call 000.
Light load
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Your safety
You said you didn't feel fully safe today. That matters. Tell your manager. Removals alone, at night or at unfamiliar places carry real risks, so ask about working in pairs.
Getting home safely
You said you've got very little energy left. If you're driving, a 15 to 20 minute nap before you leave can help, or get a lift. Text someone when you're home.
What might help
People you can call
This isn't a medical assessment. It's a way to notice how you're going over time.
How it's been going
Last 14 days
Handovers
This phone isn't letting the page save, so handovers won't be kept.
Privacy & your data
Add a PIN, download what you've entered, or delete everything from this phone.
Caring for the dead takes something out of you
What to watch for, and what helps. Tap a heading to open it.
When a baby or child has died
Almost everyone in death care finds these the hardest. Feeling it more doesn't make you less professional.
Today
- Check in with a colleague before your next task.
- If you can, don't do the next child case alone.
- It's OK to cry, or to feel nothing much at all.
Over time
- Notice if it stirs up thoughts about children in your own life.
- Red Nose (1300 308 307) supports families after the death of a baby or child, 24/7. It's a good number to give families too.
Traumatic deaths and difficult remains
Violent deaths, accidents, decomposition and long-undiscovered deaths can leave strong images, smells and sounds.
Today
- Take a break, get fresh air, eat something.
- Talk it through with a colleague who understands.
- Wash, change clothes, and do something that marks the end of the day.
Over the next weeks
- Images and smells coming back usually fade over a few weeks.
- If they don't, or you're avoiding work or sleep, see your GP or EAP. Trauma counselling works.
After a death by suicide
These deaths can hit harder, especially if you meet the family or it reminds you of someone.
- StandBy Support After Suicide (1300 727 247) supports anyone affected by a suicide, including people who respond to it through work.
- Families may be in shock. It's OK to just be present.
- Look after yourself too. A suicide can stir up your own history.
When it's someone you know
Especially in smaller towns, you may care for someone you knew, or their family.
- Ask a colleague to take it if you can.
- If you do it, it's OK to grieve too.
- Let your manager know so they can check in on you.
Grieving families
Families may be in shock, angry, or in conflict with each other, and it can come out at you.
- It's usually not about you.
- You don't have to take abuse. Step away and get your manager.
- Debrief after a hard arrangement or service.
On call and overnight transfers
- Tiredness can affect driving as much as alcohol. Don't drive if you can't keep your eyes open.
- Where possible, work in pairs for removals, especially at night or at private homes.
- Make sure someone knows where you are and when you should be back.
- Protect sleep between calls.
When deaths pile up
Busy seasons, pandemics and disasters can mean case after case without time to feel any of them.
- Notice gallows humour turning bitter, or feeling nothing at all.
- Small rituals help: a pause, a candle, a moment of respect at the end of the day.
- Take your leave. Rest is part of the job.
After a mistake
A wrong detail, a mix-up, or something that upset a family. Mistakes in this work feel heavy.
- Tell your manager straight away.
- Tell someone you trust. You don't have to carry it alone.
- If a formal process worries you, talk to your union first.
Bullying, harassment or conflict
You don't have to put up with it, and you don't have to sort it out alone.
- Write down what happened, with dates, while it's fresh.
- If your manager is involved, talk to someone outside your reporting line.
- The Fair Work Commission can make orders to stop bullying at work.
- For sexual harassment, 1800RESPECT (1800 737 732) is there 24/7.
Signs you're carrying too much
- Dreading the phone ringing
- Feeling numb, or cut off from people at home
- Images or smells coming back
- Sleep changes, or drinking more to switch off
- Losing a sense of meaning in the work
These are signs of built-up grief or compassion fatigue. They're a normal response to this work, not a weakness.
Getting home safely
After a long day or a night call-out, tiredness can affect your driving as much as alcohol.
- If you're struggling to keep your eyes open, don't drive. A 15 to 20 minute nap before you leave helps.
- After a hard day, text someone when you get home.
Talking about your work at home
Many people outside death care don't want to hear about it, or say the wrong thing. Find at least one person who gets it, like a colleague, a peer network or a counsellor, so you're not carrying it alone.
Death doulas and volunteers
Death doulas, hospice volunteers and community carers often work without formal debriefing. Set up your own: a supervisor, a peer group or a counsellor you can call.
When to get more help
If your load has been heavy for two weeks or more, you dread going in, or it's affecting sleep or home life, talk to your GP or EAP. A GP can set up a Mental Health Treatment Plan for Medicare-subsidised sessions with a psychologist.
People to call
Save the ones that apply to you. They stay on this phone and show up on the Help now screen.
Support lines
You don't have to go through your manager
Sometimes the person you'd normally tell is part of the problem, or it just doesn't feel safe. Here are other ways to get support. You choose what to do, and when.
From your organisation
Your funeral home, service or coronial team can add its own EAP, peer support and wellbeing numbers here.
Someone outside your reporting line
- Employee Assistance Program (EAP). Free, confidential counselling. Your manager isn't told that you called. Ask HR whether you have one.
- A colleague who gets it. Someone in death care outside your own workplace or reporting line.
- Your union. For confidential advice about safety, hours or how you're being treated.
- Your work health and safety representative. For safety issues, including lone transfers and exposure to traumatic material.
- Death doulas and volunteers: your coordinator, supervisor or peer network.
- Your GP. Outside work altogether, and can refer you on.
Text or chat instead of calling
For when talking out loud isn't possible, or feels like too much.
For particular situations
Many funeral, coronial and pathology services have their own EAP. Ask your manager or HR.
Spiritual and cultural support
Chaplains, celebrants and faith leaders you work alongside can be a support for you too, not just for families. They support people of any faith or none, and their role is to listen, not to persuade.
Some people find strength in ritual, prayer or their cultural community. Others find it in nature, music or quiet. Whatever gives you meaning counts.
Words to start with
The first sentence is often the hardest. You could say:
"I'm not ready to make a complaint. I just need to talk this through."
"Can this stay between us? Is there anything you'd have to pass on?"
"I can't stop thinking about a case."
"I need to not do the next child case."
What happens if I tell someone?
- Counsellors, peer supporters and helplines keep what you say private. The main exception is if someone is at serious risk of harm. If you're unsure, ask at the start.
- A union can give you confidential advice before you decide anything.
- Your manager may be able to change your cases or roster if you ask. You don't have to explain every detail.
- Your private record in this app stays on your phone unless you choose to share it.
Not ready to tell anyone?
That's OK. You can write down what happened, just for yourself, and decide later.
Numbers and services are for New South Wales and Australia-wide. Check with your organisation for its own services.
Write down what happened
It stays on this phone. It isn't a report, and nothing is sent anywhere. If you later decide to raise something, notes written at the time are easier to rely on than memory.
My entries
Entries can't be edited, so each one shows when it was written. To add something, write a new entry.
No entries yet.
If you decide to share it, you can download it or send it to yourself.
Your phone, your data
PIN lock
Ask for a PIN when the app opens, and after it has been in the background for a minute.
PIN is on.
The PIN stops someone else opening the app on your phone. It doesn't encrypt what's stored, so keep your phone locked too. If you forget it, you can delete everything and start again.
Hide the screen
Tap the eye button at the top of any screen to cover the app straight away, for example in the staff room or in the car. Tap to come back, or enter your PIN if you've set one.
Download my data
Download everything you've entered (handovers, private record and contacts) as a text file. You could keep a copy, or show it to your GP or counsellor.
Delete everything
Deletes your handovers, private record, role, contacts and PIN from this phone.
Delete everything from this phone? This can't be undone.
About Unladen Vigil
Unladen Vigil is a prototype made by Co-Synthesist Pty Ltd, Newcastle NSW. It isn't a medical or emergency service, and it isn't connected to any funeral provider, coroner, employer or government agency. The questions haven't been clinically validated yet.
What's stored: your role, handovers, private record, saved contacts and settings, only in this phone's browser. Nothing is sent to anyone. There are no accounts, analytics or trackers.
Feedback: the feedback form is the only part of Unladen Vigil that sends anything, and only when you press Send. It doesn't include anything else from the app.
Keep in mind: if you clear your browser data or remove the app, what you've entered goes too. Download a copy first if you want to keep it.
Version 0.1 prototype · September 2026